Category: Opinion

Letter from the Editor – January 2026

Dear Busy Bees,

It’s been a minute since I’ve published anything here – since June 2023. You may be wondering why I haven’t been writing here, what I’ve been up to and what the vision for this blog is going forward.

I haven’t been writing here, though I have been writing especially lately. That’s related to both good and bad experiences in my personal life, and I think you may be able to relate. I was studying very hard and growing in my career and went through a very busy season that stretched into a couple years. I took a few important tests related to this and they were time intensive. I also worked very hard at that career and unfortunately started to take time for myself less. Not very Thursday of me.

It is still the purpose of this blog to make space for good times, to explore and to create. It also is becoming a goal to find how to stay present and plugged in to ourselves and joy. On that note, while I am sad I didn’t publish here for a while, I know it had to become a tertiary priority for a while due to what I was doing. If there is a next time, I hope I will take the time to recognize that and communicate it here. That’s probably a good general lesson for life. I am proud that I have become less hard on myself since I last wrote here. I am also taking better care of myself.

Since the last time I published, I have traveled to Fla., Calif., Ky and the Bahamas. I attempted to go to Bonnaroo in Manchester, Tenn. which was cancelled due to flooding and rain. It was still a great experience for me. I look forward to recapping some of my travels. I am still mostly located in Clarksville, Tenn., with strong roots in San Diego, Calif. In the time since I last wrote I have met and made friends in Clarksville and had some character shaping experiences. My roots are in Clarksville too.

My husband and I spent time planning a wedding in Calif. I got married in May 2024 to my amazing husband. Knowing that next month is Valentine’s let me just say this: May you also find the love that is the person who lets you be safe coming out of your shell. If he doesn’t make you feel comfortable expressing yourself when you are doing things aligned with your values he isn’t for you. He should make you feel safer when you do the right thing. If he doesn’t adore and cherish you and make you feel beautiful, you’re simply not right for each other. While you do have to choose and commit to each other everyday and navigate difficult seasons, if someone offers you love less than this, don’t waste your time. Don’t want or be placated by quarter and half-measures especially before the seasons of life even truly begin.

Speaking of busy seasons, I have changed locations and career spaces for work a few times. I have had some moments of nostalgia and reflection related to how to make my next career move. While I am limited in what I can share about work, that has been a lot of adjustments and I’m glad to say it should be more settled soon. I am excited for the next chapter and feel like I am cautiously testing the waters.

Another thing that may be settled soon is house renovations! We are a vanity and toilet installation away from being done with a house remodel. It cannot come too soon! It’s amazing how delays and construction go so hand in hand.

As we go forward into the now, I reflect on goals and purpose. I (obviously) hope projects and changes get wrapped up. I hope to find clarity but understand that even without clarity I still have the values that make me who I am and will be safe due to the life I’ve already built, alongside my husband. Sometimes that is the truest mark of success one can have. I am excited to reflect on my experiences and journeys in a few ways though maybe I’m still taking my time on that.

My goals for this blog are often similar to my goals as a person. There are things I want to explore, like writing, audio and coding. I also want to reflect on journeys in a way that is appropriate. I want to continue to be someone who is plugged in to my community, the moment and myself. I want to be present and mindful. I want to find balance while also acknowledging that there are different seasons and energy levels. Often balance is a myth and what matters is routine and checking in. Some days you have to prioritize your health and some days you must make time for friends.  I want to have a good time and be social. A lot of that good time connects to reading books, traveling, and being creative.  

My purpose for this blog is to take time for the best things in life. To prioritize joy and health.

I hope that I can work on my professional presence in a way where I can be non-judgmental, open, and always keep the goal in mind. I struggle with taking care of myself as much as others do and in a way that supports that presence. I hope that I will continue to grow in that ability.

I feel like you may be asking what’s next? To that I hope to see myself writing more, both here and in a novel. I hope to eventually get into audio or podcast creation. I am also wondering if I should revisit coding, particularly if I decide to shift careers again. I am planning on looking into the Google Developer Program. I’ve always liked writing about my explorations and learning.

I have been doing some things which I hope to continue doing. I have been getting back to crafting, loom-knitting, sewing and miniatures. Those will be easy to write about. I have been focused on decluttering and cleaning my space and making sure my stuff reflects the person I am trying to be. I’ve had great results and my house feels calm, other than the renovations. There are so many better resources on decluttering than mine, so I probably won’t write on that. I have also been doing a fair amount of reading, which I also intend to write about more.

I hope to continue to set down roots where I’m planted. I’ve been realizing that I need to attend more coffee meetups with other women. Often times it feels like it is just my husband and I in this state. I know that’s not the case as I do have friends and communities here, but it can be a challenge and a delight to move somewhere you don’t know anyone. My husband and I both do a lot to support each other and if you aren’t in the club that his career puts us in, then you probably can’t understand its specific challenges and the type of loneliness that it can cause us to face. I frequently struggle with loneliness and having experiences where family/coworkers/acquaintances don’t understand how to support me, even when I have supported them. It is heartbreaking and can be the cherry on the cake somedays.

While I have a wonderful dance community, I have been struggling to find a renaissance reenactment group here that meets regularly. I reflected a bit about people who have made those groups meaningful to me in the past. They were always providing hospitality and food, in addition to knowledge. I think I want to start hosting intimate feasts at our home to build a closer-knit group of historical reenactment enthusiasts.

Thank you for letting me recap my challenges and last couple years. I appreciate taking the time to refocus and look forward to writing in the future.

All my love,

Honey

Walt Whitman’s 2020

by Sarah Hughes

Walt Whitman’s Civil War Poetry and Prose ages well for all the turbulence of 2020. Here are some quotes from poems and letters to remind the modern reader what’s old is new, and allow reflection on the past year’s tensions.

Normal abruptly stops

/How you sprang – how you threw off costumes of peace with indifferent hand,/

/How your soft opera-music changed, and the drum and fife were heard in their stead,/ (1)

Image by ml991 from Pixabay. Picture of a flute set down. All rights reserved.

/The mechanics arming, (the trowel, the jack-plane, the blacksmith’s hammer, tost aside with precipitation,)/ 

/The lawyer leaving his office and arming, the judge leaving the court,/ 

/The driver deserting his wagon in the street, jumping down, throwing the reins abruptly down on the horses’ backs,/ 

/The salesman leaving the store, the boss, the book-keeper, porter, all leaving;/ (2)

/Leave not the bridegroom quiet – no happiness must he have now with his bride,/

/Nor the peaceful farmer any peace, ploughing his field or gathering his grain,/ (4)

/No bargainers’ bargain by day – no brokers or speculators – would they continue?/

/Would the talkers be talking? would the singer attempt to sing?/

/Would the lawyer rise in the court to state his case before the judge?/ (4)

Image by Peter H from Pixabay.
Picture of abandoned café or workplace. All rights reserved.

Pent up turbulence

/Forty years as a pageant, till unawares the lady of this teeming and turbulent city,/

/Sleepless amid her ships, her houses, her incalculable wealth,/ 

/With her million children around her, suddenly,/

/At dead of night, at news from the south,/

/Incens’d struck with clinch’d hand the pavement./ (1)

Year of the struggle

/Arm’d year – year of the struggle,/

/No dainty rhymes or sentimental love verses for you terrible year,/ (3)

“with all their large conflicting fluctuations of despair & hope, the shiftings, masses, & the whirl & deafening din” (80)

New fashion and pounds

/With the pomp of the inloop’d flags with the cities draped in black,/

/With the show of the States themselves as of crape-veil’d women standing,/ (28)

“I miss you all, my darlings and gossips, Fred Gray, and Bloom and Russell and everybody. I wish you would all come here in a body – that would be divine (we would drink ale, which here is the best). My health, strength, personal beauty, etc., are, I am happy to inform you, without dimunition, but on the contrary quite the reverse. I weigh full 220 pounds avoirdupois, yet still retain my usual perfect shape – a regular model.” (64)

Longing for loved ones and focusing on simple things

“Dearest son: it would be more pleasure if we could be together just in quiet, in some plain way of living, with some good employment and reasonable income, where I could have you often with me, than all the dissipations and amusements of this great city – O I hope things may work so that we can yet have each other’s society – for I cannot bear the thought of being separated from you – I know I am a great fool about such things but I tell you the truth dear son.” (75)

Image by No-longer-here from Pixabay.
Picture of a civil war letter. All rights reserved.

Meaning in turmoil

“When I found dear brother George, and found that he was alive and well, O you may imagine how trifling all my little cares and difficulties seemed – they vanished into nothing.” (60)

“there is something that takes down all artificial accomplishments” (75)

“I do not feel to fret or whimper, but in my heart and soul about our country, the forthcoming campaign with all its vicissitudes and the wounded and slain – I dare say, mother, I feel the reality more than some because I am in the midst of its saddest results so much.” (77)  

“I will write you a few lines – as a casual friend that sat by his death-bed.” (82)

Whitman writes surrounded by death, commenting on the circumstances of his world and missing loved ones, even writing some letters while sick. It’s as if life has halted for war and injuries of war.

Image by Brigitte makes custom works from your photos, thanks a lot from Pixabay.
Picture of civil war cannon in Chattanooga, TN. All rights reserved.

Of course, Whitman is writing about the Civil War, so images of agitations are more dire and tragic, even if they bear resemblance to current day.

Walt Whitman’s Civil War Poetry and Prose is available in Dover Thrift Edition via Books-A-Million and Amazon.

DMV Experience Comparison: CA vs. TN

I recently moved to Clarksville, Tenn. from San Diego, Calif. which means I had to register my car and exchange my drivers license to my new state. While I expected this process to be cheaper in Tenn. it was also much faster than any experience I’ve ever had in a Calif. Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV).

The Clarksville County Clerk had me out in 18 minutes and cost $94 to exchange a CA car title to a TN title, and to pay registration for the 2021 year. Just my registration for Calif. would have been $244 in 2021. I brought a few necessary documents outlined on a government website, and showed up on a Wednesday without an appointment. Additionally, my boyfriend was able to drop by a couple days before we went in to ask the Clerk for guidance on how to proceed. 


The Clarksville County Clerk had me out in 18 minutes and cost $94 to exchange a CA car title to a TN title, and to pay registration for the 2021 year. Just my registration for Calif. would have been $244 in 2021.

Likewise a trip to the Driver Services Center went well without an appointment. We arrived about 8:00 AM, knowing the Center opened at 8:30 AM and bracing ourselves for typical DMV lines. The line at this particular center was about half the size of what I’ve seen at Calif. ones 45 minutes to an hour before opening. 

We were being staged before the Center opened officially. To me this aspect of the Center’s procedure seemed revolutionary and also a simple bit of genius. Two people staging where people need to go will of course make the rest of the day go quicker and verify people have required documents before they go inside. 

Map of CA

Photo provided by Google. All rights reserved.

The 20 spots for people who needed road tests were full by about 8:15 AM, which seemed the only downside. However, my personal Calif. Road Test experience many years ago involved two trips due to an appointment the DMV lost info on and overscheduled. So I can’t say that this is really even a point lost for the Clarksville Center. 

My required documents were checked and I only needed what was listed online. I believed I needed a written test, but was delighted to be informed I did not even need to take that as my Calif. license was still valid. (Dear Reader, I have never been told something by a DMV worker in Calif. which has reduced my workload in any way. I was overjoyed at the efficiency and service I received in Clarksville). 


I believed I needed a written test, but was delighted to be informed I did not even need to take that as my Calif. license was still valid.

I was in the building by 8:30 AM as the seventh person in the particular line I needed. Due to Covid-19 health protocols, my boyfriend, who did not have DMV related business, was not able to enter with me as the Center was limiting capacity as a precaution. This was understandable and expected. It was very cool that he was able to wait with me outside however.

I waited patiently inside before I was called to reaffirm answers to questions related to what typically goes on a driver’s license. I had my picture taken and presented my documents. I paid $28 and was given a temporary paper license complete with a picture. I was told that my permanent license would be mailed to me in two to three weeks. I was out and we were on the road at 9:25 AM.


I paid $28 and was given a temporary paper license complete with a picture. I was told that my permanent license would be mailed to me in two to three weeks.

I recount my experience with the Clarksville Driver Service Center with utter amazement. I knew it would cost less to register, but I am pleasantly shocked by the other differences in Tenn. I was done so much faster and helped so much more. 

Map of TN
Photo provided by Google. All rights reserved.

I’ve heard friends in Calif. recently mention experiences with the DMV during Covid-19 that lasted between 45 minutes and 2 hours. It is unclear if this has to do with necessary health protocols which have changed the experience.

In the past, I have counted myself lucky if I got out of the Calif. DMV in less than 2 hours without an appointment and in an hour with one.

GRAPES Journaling

by Sarah Hughes

Watching my social media feeds, it seems that we are all hitting some mentally turbulence as we come up on the anniversary of entering Covid-19 quarantine. 

Though I certainly have not had the easiest year in taking care of myself, I have found some solace in building a few positive habits. One of these is a mindful effort to journal how I’ve taken care of my mental state each day.

There’s a common psychology saying that GRAPES a day keeps the psychologist away, much like eating an apple a day keeps the doctor away. 

“I am talking about the acronym “GRAPES”: Gentleness, Relaxation, Accomplishment, Pleasure, Exercise and Social,” says BurdTherapy.com. “These elements help keep us happy and content and are ways to practice healthy coping skills. Use the acronym as a way to quickly remember activities to practice self care.”

The acronym is meant to be a tool for people to take care of their mental health each day. Each letter is supposed to be a reminder to do something to feed the realms of life in a way that engages them. It is essentially breaking down the elements of happiness to be intentional about fostering happiness and care.

Picture of a journal with notes on GRAPES acronym: Gentleness - Be gentle with yourself and your expectations Relaxation - Do at least one thing relaxing Accomplishment - Do something that makes you feel good about your abilities Pleasure - Do something that brings you pleasure Exercise - Do at least 30-60 minutes of exercise that gets your heart going Social - Interact with positive people
Photo provided by Sarah Hughes. Picture of a journal with notes on GRAPES acronym. All rights reserved.

What I did with this is determined to reflect on what I’ve done for each letter each day, often noting how I performed each in a journal. Recording a quick sentence for each keeps me making rounded progress at taking care of myself and improves my mood. 

Journaling my progress at GRAPES reminds me that I am not just the A for accomplishment. I’ve realized from the exercise that I struggle with finding time to feed G and P the most. It’s hard to be mindful about treating myself with grace and being happy each day. I believe I struggle with those activities because I feel that my to do list must be completed for me to indulge in pleasurable activities or give myself approval. The exercise made me realize how weird it is that happiness and self-love aren’t daily goals for me. 

I hope that journaling how you take care of your happiness elements can also bring you more of it during our present times.